I am the sum of my mind, body, and soul. I am the collaboration of events that have taken place to mold these things. My mind is made of lessons learned whether through failure or victory. It is made of teachings both true and false. It is a collage of ideas and a store house for my memories both good and bad. My mind is a tool used to decipher the trials and tribulations of life. It is my own personal library of events; records of my interactions here on earth. My mind is a instrument of incredible capability; an instrument that if used properly can conceive the very purpose of life, but on the other hand if the lessons are ignored and the mind is abused nothing is learned and all will suffer. The mind will be filled with lies, the body will rot and the soul will be lost.
I have abused my mind and all did suffer, but I do not regret these things. For the beauty of the mind is it can be healed and if the abuse is stopped the negative betrayal becomes positive lessons. Lessons that can be shared to aid in the teachings and healing of others. My mind is the sum total of all that I have witnessed and not witnessed of all I have learned and not learned. It is a muscle of the body and a window to the soul.
My Body is my vessel. It is a home to my mind and a haven for my soul. My body is of the earth for the earth gives my body the nutrients it needs to survive. My body is a reflection of my mind. Scars show of lessons learned , and memories made. A fit or poor build shows knowledge of health, motivation, or the lack of. It can show signs of depression and signs of addiction. Wrinkles show memories of smiles or memories of frowns, and the eyes show sparkles of life or the dullness of sorrow. My body is a store house for my soul from birth till death. Both my body and my mind have a profound impact on whether my soul leaves this lifetime enlightened or neglected.
I have neglected my body but like my mind it can be healed both inside and out. For my body is of the earth, and the earth provides the nutrients we need to mend our wounds.
My soul... how does one define their soul. I believe it is the essence of karma from ones past and present life. An essence of Karma instilled with a dream or destiny. A specific energy given to a specific person for a specific purpose. The mind is a tool used by the soul to learn and enlighten this destiny, and the body is an instrument of physical manifestation. A tangible object capable of carrying out one's purpose.
So who am I. I'm a mind, a body and a soul. I am a compilation of events both good and bad. I am a life force with a purpose. I am a being who has and will make many mistakes, but through these mistakes I have learned and will learn many things. So even my mistakes if learned from can be added to my list of victories.
I am a man who will suffer through or enjoy all that comes my way, and I will do all this in stride while doing my best to smile. For this is my life, my purpose and my desire; to learn all that I can, so that I may teach it to you and hopefully one day my child.
My life as Luis
Sometimes, it seems like the easiest thing to do would be to get over you, but things that sound simple are rarely so when put in the proper context. It’s okay though, since I still feel my heart beating every night before I go to sleep so I know that I’ll make it. That you haven’t quite won. At least not in the sense that I’m through fighting.
Sometimes, it seems like the easiest thing to do would be to give up. I’m more of a lover than a fighter and more of a coward than a hero. But the thing is I’m through just lying down and taking whatever the world throws at me. You told me to try harder and I swear I was. So if I thought I could fix anything, I’d travel halfway across the world just for another chance. I’d give my last breath if you wanted it, but you don’t so I’m rerouting a new course that doesn’t keep diverting me into these endless turns of unrequited love. I’m finding a different way even if it means giving up this map and forgetting all my plans. This is what forgiveness sounds like. You don’t know it yet, but I’m saying goodbye. Maybe you remember what that used to feel like. I don’t know. I don’t really care.
Sometimes, it seems like the easiest thing to do would be to start over. Except I know that saying goodbye to a lifetime of forevers will never be the simplest thing I do. But the sooner I start, the sooner I find something else. I’d like to believe I deserve to be happy. To not fall asleep alone. To get out of this place alive. To be loved, wanted or needed. To be someone. Anyone. Except I’m never quite so sure that I’ll ever be good enough for anything but this.
